scarmydoc

Hello to all. I am still here in Gardez, and was very fortunate to be able to spend Christmas here with my team and friends. I debated on whether or not to delete my last post, but in keeping with my feelings of "don't hold anything back," I have decided to leave it up.

My Christmas was good, I slept until 12:15. Lunch was good. We had roast beef, turkey, ham, mac & cheese, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, stuffing, greens, crab legs, fried shrimp, boiled shrimp, ice cream, peach cobbler, corn bread, pecan pie, and a bunch of other stuff that I didn't get around to!

I spent the rest of my afternoon in the coffee shop playing rummy with Jordan, Moore, and our team interpreters, Mohamed and James. They had come back from their holiday celebration of Eid just to be able to spend Christmas Day with the team. We all ate Christmas Dinner together, which was just a continuation of lunch.

We did get a shipment of mail in from the PRT, but the Post Office was closed for Christmas, so I went today. I collected 10 boxes and 2 cards, which explained the look I got from SPC Sundquist when I stepped into his mailroom! I'd like to thank Jane Ames, Ginger Sullivan, Tippi Harwell, Joan Hardin and the wonderful girls of Brownie Troop 25421 of Dunwoody, GA, Erica & Brian Davis and their three children Noah, Caleb and Mason, Mom and Dad, Kelly, Linda Nolan and the great staff of CL Services, Meg and Junior, Jim & Nancy Stewart, and Celia for all the wonderful treats, cards and surprises.

Since I was here in my room, I'm very thankful that I was able to speak with all my family, Mama and Dad, Linda and John, and Kelly, and my extended family, Sandra, Mark, & and Kyle Anderson. I'm sorry that I missed you Celia, Liana, and Stephen.

I hope that everyone had a wonderful day and that Santa brought you all that you asked for (except for my early arrival home, sorry, Santa tried but the Army had other plans!). I wish that I could have been home. I especially missed dad's Christmas morning pancakes, lunch at Sandra's, and Chinese for supper with Doris and Bill. I did not miss the holiday traffic in Charleston.

Congratulations to Meg and Greta on your wonderful news. I'm sure that your children will be blessed little angels, and I look forward to seeing you and them next year for the family Christmas. Amy and James, Jimmy, Bud & Bem, I look forward to seeing you all when I come home. Hope you all enjoyed Grandma's punch for me this year, and I'll be back next year for it! James and Junior, make sure the deer and turkey are running. I don't plan on missing another season.

Congratulations to Katy, I'm sure that you and George will be blessed with another sweet angel. Clay, I got to fire the Barrett .50-cal and Dillon Mini-gun. You're jealous as hell, I can feel it! Let's get out and knock down a few duck and/or geese this year. Lida, I missed your pumpkin pies at Thanksgiving, and I will miss all of you coming to Florence for the Moore Christmas. I'll be there next year to get my fill of pie. Tell Harry I said hello and Happy Holidays.

This was a very different Christmas to celebrate, spent with new friends, and missing family. It's a feeling that I cannot explain, and do not wish to feel again, but I will be there whenever my country calls. Through my experiences with EMS and now here with the Army, I have realized that if life is worth saving, it is worth living. If these experiences have taught me anything, it is not to squander time thoughtlessly. Live life like it's the only one you've got, and to quote Van Wilder, "Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out alive."

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Sleep well tonight, I'm standing watch to protect you.

Well, in my last post, I commented on how we had taken our last mission until January, and that our next trip wouldn't be until January, and then only the new team and key leaders of the old team. WRONG! We took another trip on the KG Pass about a week or two ago. Wasted time if you ask me, since our mission was to assess the three ANP District Centers to determine which one was large enough to accommodate four large tents. We went to escort the Constable team, since they needed four trucks to roll. Having lived on the Pass for a few months, we could have told them which DC was large enough, but nobody asked us. We didn't learn about the mission goal until after we got to the Garda Shuri DC. More stupidy and putting soldiers lives at risk for unnecessary reasons.

So we made it back safely, and began our routine of sleeping late, missing breakfast and lunch, going to the gym late at night, and other stuff to help pass the boredom away, all thinking that our next mission wouldn't come until after the Holidays. WRONG! Our next mission might not happen at all due to the new team not getting here in time before the old team rips out, but what's Holley doing? Going on another mission with the Constable team, and on Christmas Day to boot.

So when everyone else is sleeping late, eating good food for their Christmas meal, I don't know really where I'll be, but I know that I'll be in a Humvee for about 7-8 hours. OK, I do know where I'll be, but I'm not posting it at this time since it will be online prior to my departure, and I really don't want the bad guys knowing when and where I'm going to.

So my Christmas will be pretty lame. I was really looking forward to being able to talk to my family and friends tomorrow, but they've got other plans for me. That sucks! But then again, this is a war, and we don't always have the luxury of having time off and doing what we want, when we want.

So Merry Christmas to all! I hope that your day is happy and full of joy. Mine will be too once I get to where I'm going safe and sound. I hope that Santa is good to each of you and you all get some wonderful surprises this year.

Hopefully there won't be too many more times I have to say this, but for one (hopefully) last time:

Maniac Mike - out

Well it has finally come, the last mission we will run as a team. There will be one more mission, but it will not come until the replacements have arrived, and even then, the entire team will not be rolling out again, just key members and the new guys.

I can not express how happy I am to be able to say "the new guys," yet there is a sense of sadness that envelopes us knowing that we will not be "The Team" anymore. It hasn't all been good, but it hasn't all been bad. Like all groups, we have our ups and downs, but we have all learned from each other and cultivated some great friendships as well.

Three of us have made a promise that at least two times a year we will all get together and do something with our wives or significant others. I hope that promise holds as these are two incredible men and it would be a shame to let our friendships desolve. My buddy and gunner Pete Moore and I are so good of friends that I asked him to be in my wedding, whenever that will be.

So now, I am left attending classes at the TMC, going to the gym, and playing my Playstation 2 until I go on leave in January. If things get too boring, I might meander down to the TMC and do a little work!

Thinking of leave is now what keeps me in high spirits. We have rooms booked at an old resort in Historic Key West. I cannot wait until my triumphant return to the islands, and as last time, I'm not sure that they will ever be the same. I look forward to be, as the great Jimmy Buffett says, "living and dying in 3/4 time." Eight days, seven nights in the Keys will surely do me well after being in this place for 9 months. 9 months! Wow, and to think I'll be a short-timer when I return!

Speaking of timelines, as of today, I am 11 days away from my six year mark with the National Guard. I can hardly believe that six years has come and past since that fateful December when I signed my life away. Six years ago, I could not have guessed that I would be sitting in Gardez, Afghanistan, fighting the same enemy that attacked us six years ago. I do not regret my decision and I am proud to serve my country, even if it means being away from all that I love at home. I will come home with lots of stories, pictures, videos, and probably a few habits that only those who have been here will understand, and the time here will change me as well. Hell, I'm sure that it already has in some ways, but I only hope to take home a new appreciation of our Freedoms and Rights as Americans. Seeing how these people live and what they have to live with saddens my heart, and I hope that one day they too will know what it means to live freely.

I will also miss the movies. LOL I mean, where else can you spend $2 and get 20 movies on 1 disc? I will definitely miss the bazar.The bazar comes to Gardez every Saturday and Sunday, and we go both days to eat kabob. I do not know the names of the people, but they know us and we know them, and our greetings always consist of handshakes and hugs, and much is discussed over chai at the "We Have Carpets" restaurant. Of course, that it not the name, but we go and sit on piles of folded rugs and eat and drink. The young man who runs the shop brings us the food as his father cooks it, and we bring candy to the younger boys who run around the bazar trying to bring customers to the shop. Last week, the man, his father, and his helper took pictures with us, and today the young man brought us a picture of his wall at home with our pictures in a frame hanging there.

I'm sure that coming home, I'll be sitting around the house or at a gathering of friends, and my sentence will start with, "Well, when I was in Afghanistan....." I'll probably be in church and lean over and say, "At least it's not in Polish." (The only priest we can get down here is Polish)

That's all I've got today. I'm sure something will happen and I'll get some more on here. 'Til next time.

This is an article that was forwarded to all of Camp Lightning from MAJ Dukeman. I thought it was worth passing around and getting the message out.


By JOSEPH L. GALLOWAY McClatchy Newspapers


Over the last 12 months, 1,042 soldiers, Marines, sailors and Air Force
personnel have given their lives in the terrible duty that is war.
Thousands more have come home on stretchers, horribly wounded and facing
months or years in military hospitals.

This week, I'm turning my space over to a good friend and former
roommate, Army Lt. Col. Robert Bateman , who recently completed a
yearlong tour of duty in Iraq and is now back at the Pentagon. Here's
Lt. Col. Bateman's account of a little-known ceremony that fills the
halls of the Army corridor of the Pentagon with cheers, applause and
many tears every Friday morning. It first appeared on May 17 on the
Weblog of media critic and pundit Eric Alterman at the Media Matters for
America Website.

"It is 110 yards from the "E" ring to the "A" ring of the Pentagon. This
section of the Pentagon is newly renovated; the floors shine, the
hallway is broad, and the lighting is bright. At this instant the entire
length of the corridor is packed with officers, a few sergeants and some
civilians, all crammed tightly three and four deep against the walls.
There are thousands here. This hallway, more than any other, is the
`Army' hallway. The G3 offices line one side, G2 the other, G8 is around
the corner. All Army. Moderate conversations flow in a low buzz. Friends
who may not have seen each other for a few weeks, or a few years, spot
each other, cross the way and renew. Everyone shifts to ensure an open
path remains down the center. The air conditioning system was not
designed for this press of bodies in this area. The temperature is
rising already. Nobody cares.

"10:36 hours: The clapping starts at the E-Ring. That is the outermost
of the five rings of the Pentagon and it is closest to the entrance to
the building. This clapping is low, sustained, hearty. It is applause
with a deep emotion behind it as it moves forward in a wave down the
length of the hallway.

"A steady rolling wave of sound it is, moving at the pace of the soldier
in the wheelchair who marks the forward edge with his presence. He is
the first. He is missing the greater part of one leg, and some of his
wounds are still suppurating. By his age I expect that he is a private,
or perhaps a private first class.

"Captains, majors, lieutenant colonels and colonels meet his gaze and
nod as they applaud, soldier to soldier. Three years ago when I
described one of these events, those lining the hallways were somewhat
different. The applause a little wilder, perhaps in private guilt for
not having shared in the burden yet.

"Now almost everyone lining the hallway is, like the man in the
wheelchair, also a combat veteran. This steadies the applause, but I
think deepens the sentiment. We have all been there now. The soldier's
chair is pushed by, I believe, a full colonel.

"Behind him, and stretching the length from Rings E to A, come more of
his peers, each private, corporal, or sergeant assisted as need be by a
field grade officer.

"11:00 hours: Twenty-four minutes of steady applause. My hands hurt, and
I laugh to myself at how stupid that sounds in my own head. My hands
hurt. Please! Shut up and clap. For twenty-four minutes, soldier after
soldier has come down this hallway - 20, 25, 30. Fifty-three legs come
with them, and perhaps only 52 hands or arms, but down this hall came 30
solid hearts.

"They pass down this corridor of officers and applause, and then meet
for a private lunch, at which they are the guests of honor, hosted by
the generals. Some are wheeled along. Some insist upon getting out of
their chairs, to march as best they can with their chin held up, down
this hallway, through this most unique audience. Some are catching
handshakes and smiling like a politician at a Fourth of July parade.
More than a couple of them seem amazed and are smiling shyly.

"There are families with them as well: the 18-year-old war-bride pushing
her 19-year-old husband's wheelchair and not quite understanding why her
husband is so affected by this, the boy she grew up with, now a man, who
had never shed a tear is crying; the older immigrant Latino parents who
have, perhaps more than their wounded mid-20s son, an appreciation for
the emotion given on their son's behalf.

"No man in that hallway, walking or clapping, is ashamed by the silent
tears on more than a few cheeks. An Airborne Ranger wipes his eyes only
to better see. A couple of the officers in this crowd have themselves
been a part of this parade in the past. These are our men, broken in
body they may be, but they are our brothers, and we welcome them home.

"This parade has gone on, every single Friday, all year long, for more
than four years.

"Did you know that?

The media hasn't yet told the story. And probably never will.

This was forwarded to me by Kelly, and was written by an unknown soldier somewhere overseas. I just thought it was worth passing on to others.



The Night Before Christmas

T'was the night before Christmas,
He lived all alone,
In a one bedroom house,
Made of plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney,
With presents to give,
And to see just who,
In this home did live.

I looked all about,
A strange sight I did see,
No tinsel, no presents,
Not even a tree.

No stocking by the mantle,
Just boots filled with sand,
On the wall hung pictures,
Of far distant lands.

With medals and badges,
Awards of all kinds,
A sober thought,
Came through my mind.

For this house was different,
It was dark and dreary,
I found the home of a soldier,
Once I could see clearly.

The soldier lay sleeping,
Silent, alone,
Curled up on the floor,
In this one bedroom home.

The face was so gentle,
The room in such disorder,
Not how I pictured,
A U.S. soldier.

Was this the hero,
Of whom I'd just read?,
Curled up on a poncho,
The floor for a bed?

I realized the families,
That I saw this night,
Owed their lives to these soldiers,
Who were willing to fight.

Soon round the world,
The children would play,
And grownups would celebrate,
A bright Christmas Day.

They all enjoyed freedom,
Each month of the year,
Because of the soldiers,
Like the one lying here.

I couldn't help wonder,
How many lay alone,
On a cold Christmas Eve,
In a land far from home.

The very thought brought
A tear to my eye,
I dropped to my knees,
And started to cry.

The soldier awakened,
And I heard a rough voice,
'Santa, don't cry.
This life is my choice.

I fight for freedom,
I don't ask for more,
My life is my God,
My country, my corps.'

The soldier rolled over,
And drifted to sleep,
I couldn't control it,
I continued to weep.

I kept watch for hours,
So silent and still,
And we both shivered,
From the cold night's chill.

I didn't want to leave,
On that cold, dark night,
This guardian of honor,
So willing to fight.

Then the soldier rolled over,
With a voice, soft and pure,
Whispered, 'Carry on Santa,
It's Christmas Day, all is secure.'

One look at my watch,
And I knew he was right,
'Merry Christmas my friend,
And to all a good night.'

As most, or some of you know, I'm still with the same team, PMTD-East, but we have left the "comfort" of the K-G Pass and are now operating in the Jaji and Chamkani areas. Unfortunately, all 6 of our ANP Districts are all out on the border, or near the border, so there's always a major threat. In the last two weeks, 5 IEDs were found in one area, the last one we found when it went off on my Humvee. Luckily it was a small one, and didn't disable our vehicle, but it still scared the shit out of me! That was on our way back from Dand Patan, which is 2.6 km from the border.
Before that, we were in Jaji when the ABP ETTs got attacked, again, at the Border Checkpoint, and we rolled out as QRF, again, to go rescue them. The first-time we went out as QRF for them, I ended up having to Medevac two people when their truck rolled over coming down a hill. Driving with NVGs on is hard. This last time, we got really wrapped up in the firefight. If you watch "We Were Soldiers" when it gets to the part where the American are about to get over-run, that's what flashed through my mind as it was going on. There was no hiding in the vehicles while the gunner in the turret returns fire, instead, everyone was dismounted and fighting the good fight. The Taliban got within 35-40 meters of the perimeter wall, but were not able to break through. When CAS (Close Air Support) finally got on station, they were able to pick up about 45 people fighting against us, and that was after the ABP ETTs and the ABP had been fighting for about an hour, and we had been there for at least 90 minutes before the F-15s arrived. The F-15s said that they couldn't drop and bombs on the mountain side since all they had was 500 lb bombs, and we were "danger close." We eventually got 2 Apache helicopters and an A-10 Warthog on station and they were able to light up the hills like a redneck Christmas party. That was pretty cool.
The intel after the fight was the same as it was the same as the time before, and the time before that, that there was a butt load of Taliban in the mountain on the border wanting to kidnap American soldiers. It's pretty cool that 16 Americans and 9 Afghanis were able to hold off more than 90 (approx) Taliban. However, it sucked that we had to hold them off and it's an experience I'd rather not go through again! After much discussion and reporting, it was confirmed that I did get two confirmed kills. I'm sure that there were a few more than that, seeing as we could actually see the faces of the enemy as they rushed our positions. I just tried to remember the advise I was given by some of the combat proven soldiers from the 41st, never watch the man you shoot fall.
What also sucks is that our area in Chamkani has intel that 300-500 Taliban are sitting on the border near Dand Patan, and that another 200-300 are sitting in the mountain above the route we have to take to get to Jani Kheyl. There are also 20 ACM's sitting in a village on that route that have started an intimidation campaign against the locals. So we're pretty much waiting for that fight to start. God I can't wait until the snows get here and I can sit my happy ass in Gardez!

Well, I promised more posts, but I have failed to deliver! Bad Thomas! Since I returned to Gardez, I have not really had a day off to do much of anything except get my stuff ready to go for whatever came at me next. I'm now at Phoenix, still with the PMTD-East team, and still uncertain about my move to Jaji.

I will have the day off tomorrow, and I hope to spend a little of it sitting in bed and typing up some good posts for everyone to read.

Some bad, but good news, we got hit again, but everyone came through it. I'm still not sure what it was I drove over, or what exploded, but the back end of my truck did come off the ground and moved 2 feet to the left. YIKES!

Anyway, I hope to have some good reading for you in the next day or two.

turns out, I was just really dirty!

That's right faithful readers, I'm back! And not a moment too soon. I thought up that catchy title while I was in the shower tonight, and unfortunately, its kinda true. I really thought that I had developed a nice tan on my face, hands, and forearms, but it all washed away tonight with the soap and hot water. I guess thats what one month with no shower will do for you!

So yeah, I went roughly 25 days with no shower, just baby wipes. It also didn't help that for 20 days I was living out of my truck, sleeping on the ground, moving from village to village, and essentially sitting around and accomplishing nothing.

We did have some fun, and we learned a few lessons like: if you leave food near the truck ants will come and never take your boots off in the truck with the windows and doors closed ("There were two boots and they both stunk equally!" - me).

I did try to do my job and help the people of the villages, but that only lead to further frustration. Once I helped one villager, they all wanted help, and it was always the same, "Doktar, Doktar, tablet." Even if they didn't have anything wrong with them, they all wanted a tablet. So since I was limited on the amount of supplies, I had to limit the amount of tablets I passed out. Since Motrin is easy, thats what I gave out the first few days, but then I realized I was going to run out at that pace, so I switched.

***Warning, what follows might seem cruel and slightly unusual, but also funny and amusing***
I remembered from a nursing class way back when that red placebos work the best, and I only had one type of red pill, laxatives. Yup, thats right, whenever I had patients who "needed" a tablet, but didn't really "need" a tablet, they got docusate, a mild stool softener.

So that was my amusement for the mission. I felt a little bad about it until Lt Col Edwards, a surgeon from Ft Bragg tell me that was probably the best way to get them to stop pestering me, yet still show them that we were there to help them.

So that's just a part of my last month. I'll be posting more over the next few days, so keep coming back for more. Also, for those of you who have tried to send me stuff in the mail, there was an error at Camp Clark, so some stuff was returned. That error did get fixed, and I did get some letters and packages, but I will no longer be getting mail at Clark, so disregard my last address change. Please go back to using the following address:

Thomas Holley
1/118th INF SECFOR
Gardez
APO, AE 09320

I don't know how long I'll be at that address, seeing as how I'm getting passed around like a $2 hooker on Fat Tuesday in New Orleans, but it will be good enough for now. Stay tuned, more excitement to come.